My Cup Runneth Over

I have had many times when I felt my cup has runneth over; each as powerful as the last. Yet, my latest experience really took me by surprise.

I am just learning about iPads and texting, so lately I’d see little signs after sentences, a smiley face, a sun, a kiss. I was curious about what these were, So, of course, I went straight to my teenage granddaughter, asking her for help about these signs.

She explained to me that they are called “emoji’s” .

“What do you mean, emojis?”

So she showed me her iPhone, saying every name had an emoji after it, describing how she felt about each person; a sad face a smiley face, a sun, a book, and so on.

I said:

“What kind of emoji is after my name?.”
“Me-Me, you have a heart!”

Wow!
There went that cup again, really running over. And to think of the joy an emoji could bring. I will never look at them the same again. Nor will I ever feel that love that I felt at the moment; love from my granddaughter, with such sweet innocence.
My cup runneth over…once again!

Waiting For The Tide

I HAD THE VERY FORTUNATE OPPORTUNITY AND MOST UNFORGETTABLE TIMES AND EXPERIENCES, THAT A RARE FEW PEOPLE HAVE EVER HAD, GOING OUT ON MY BROTHER’S BOAT, CRABBING.

MATT LIVED ON A LAGOON, ALWAYS HAD A BOAT; FISHING AND CRABBING WERE HIS LIFE. HE WORKED HARD AND LOVED HIS FAMILY, BUT LIVED TO BE OUT ON THE OPEN WATERS- WATERS ONLY FEW COULD READ AS HE DID. LIKE A WATCH.  HE KNEW EVERY TIDE, EVERY FISHING HOLE, CHANNEL, WIND, WAVE CHANGE. NO ONE KNEW THE WATER LIKE MATT. AS HE WOULD SAY “EI, THIS IS MY BACKYARD.”

WHEN I SAY HE KNEW WHERE THE CRABS WERE HE ALSO KNEW THE SIZE AND HOW MANY WE’D GET. SO EVERY WEEKEND MY HUSBAND AND I WOULD DRIVE DOWN THE SHORE TO GO OUT ON THE BOAT WITH MATT. WE’D PACK OUR BEER, FOOd, WATER, ETC, FOR OUR CRABBING EVENT. LEAVING AT SUNRISE, THE THREE OF US WOULD HEAD OUT, WITH OUR NETS, BAIT,CAGES, BUCKETS, IN MATT’S 15FT. BOAT. WE’D SIT ON COOLERS (NO SEATS ON THE BOAT). HOUR AFTER HOUR WE’D CRAB, DRINK, EAT, GET SO SUNBURNED, ANCHORED IN THE SECRET CRABBING HOLE, OF MATT’S.

BY NOON I WAS SO DONE, WITH 98 CRABS ALL OVER THE BOAT IN BUCKETS. I NEEDED TO GO HOME. TO MY DISMAY MATT SAID:

“NO EI’ …IT’S LOW TIDE… WE CAN’T GO IN TILL THE TIDE COMES IN, IN 5 HOURS!”

“ARE YOU NUTS?”

YES, HE WAS. SO FOR THE NEXT 5 HOURS, WE CRABBED, DRANK AND BAKED IN THE SUN, ALL THE WHILE SINGING OUR MADE UP SONG: ‘WAITING FOR THE TIDE” “WAITING FOR THE TIDE, JUST SITTING HERE WAITING FOR THE TIDE”, AND MANY OTHER VERSES, NOT FIT FOR PRINT.

SUCH A POIGNANT MOMENT IN MY LIFE. MY HUSBAND AND I VERY OFTEN WILL SING OUR SPECIAL SONG, “WAITING FOR THE TIDE”, AND REMEMBER THAT VERY SPECIAL DAY WITH MATT ON THE BOAT.  WE HAD MANY MORE AFTER THAT, JUST LIKE THAT. AND WE ALWAYS WAITED FOR THE TIDE!!!

THE AIRPLANE TICKETS

It was just about 2 weeks after 9/11, the most horrific event ever! everyone seemed to come together with love and sorrow, in deep sorrow. I had just received the saddest news ever in my life; that my beloved brother Matthew was fading fast, with only about a month to live, and that I’d better get to florida to see him, as soon as possible.

He had moved to florida the year before, and had gotten sick with cancer. although he had made it a point to spend the month of june with us here in jersey, he had to go back to florida. Now, I was in dire need to get to see him , one last time.

I worked day and night at the local bar and restaurant. All my customers were regulars and were aware of my plight, and they were sad for me, that I could not afford a plane ticket to go see matt, one last time. But… by some miracle,(I REALLY THINK GOD HAD A PART IN THIS) one of my regular customers came to the bar and left two round trip tickets to  Ft. Meyers, Florida for 10 days for me and my husband. So I could see Matthew one last time!

This wonderful person wanted nothing in return, he just had the means to help someone – me. Thanks to him (this amazing man), we were able to spend the last days of Matthew’s life with him. a gift words cannot even begin to describe.

This is not about a loss so profound. It is about the human kindness that I received more times than I can count. I will never forget what these airplane tickets meant to me. I wonder why a person can be so generous…just because. Then this wonderful person just disappeared from my life, never to be seen or heard from again.So… I say was he just sent from God for me. Was he some sort of guardian angel, like Gabriel, and did he get his wings, when he helped me? Whatever the answer, I am eternally grateful, for this beyond extraordinary gift; the gift of the airplane tickets, so i could be with my brother Matthew, ONE LAST TIME.

Popping The Clutch

All my cars were stick shifts. I learned to drive on a stick shift. When I had to buy a car I bought a stick shift; it was cheaper and used. But, the best thing about a stick shift, was that it would always start, if you could pop the clutch.

My Dad taught me some of the most valuable life lessons, things he knew I needed to know. I was a single parent and (alone without a man) so he made sure I knew ‘man’ things, to be safe; one being if you had a old junkie car – a stick shift, always park on a hill so you can pop the clutch when it won’t start. Ergo, the car would start and you’d get home safe. And if not on a hill , your 7 year old son could push it enough so you could pop the clutch and get them to school on time. My son, now 40 yrs old, remembers doing this and is one of very few his age who could drive a stick shift (although no one has a stick shift today and it is no longer an issue). Popping the clutch has save me many many times.

Some other very important things my dad taught me were:

– always have gallons of water in the trunk of your car, weather to drink or put into your overheated radiator
– always stay in the no-express lanes on the parkway, cause if you broke down in the express it would be harder and longer to get help. As I’d travel down to Mom and Dad’s shore house on weekends – just me and the kids- Dad would worry, that I’d get there safe.

That was long before the days of cells phones, way back in the 70’s and 80’s. Yes, life has changed, but without these valuable lessons, I would not have made many a trip…to anywhere. To this day I still have water in my trunk, I never take the express lanes, and I don’t need to pop the clutch (I now have a automatic trans).  But, if i could not have popped my clutch…

Who else but your Dad would come out at 2 am (after I got off work bar-tending), in his pajamas, to push you in a parking lot on a cold night, just so you could pop your clutch!

This may seem silly, but metaphorically speaking, I have popped the clutch through my entire life, and I’m still here because of it.

Dedicated to my wonderfully smart, teaching father Nicholas Marucci.

Sunday Dinner’s at “MeMe’s”

Yes, they still exist!

There is no rhyme or reason for these Sunday dinners at my house. They just happen. One child will text other child and say ” Let’s get together at Mom’s on Sunday”. Then they will let me know that they’re coming over for dinner around 3:00 ,”… what can we bring?”

They don’t come to see me … they all see me all the time. They come to see each other. It is the most beautiful experience, to see brother, sister, cousins and spouses all just so happy to see each other.

I should record it, as everyone is talking all at once, all to each other at the same time. Who’s in the kitchen talking to me while I’m trying to get dinner on the table? I’m worrying that they are hungry, but I realize they are more hungry to talk and be together; as the 3 little girls 5 year old and 3 year olds come running to my back door in the cinderella costumes they just changed into; screaming “Meme, open the door … we are going out on the swings!”

In the dining room, the mom’s are talking about school stuff; meanwhile, my teenage girls are helping me in the kitchen – making salad, joking, telling me they read my blog (and totally got the lefty one) sharing stories of no lefty scissors in school, and loose leaf books, and right-sided desks.

Then there’s the men in front of t.v. still amazed that the Jets just beat the Saints, and so happy!
Dinner is finally served, and no one has stopped talking yet…eating and saying grace all at the same time, and the talking and joking and laughing continue. More love comes with coffee and dessert: I have made everyone’s favorite things (yum, yum). All are happy and full and still talking.

Then, the “good-nights”, kisses , hugs, “love you’s”, and they’re all gone.

Silence!!!!!

Meme and Poppy hug, look at the wonderful mess we have to clean up, and love every bit of it: A special holiday in itself, yet so much better, for all we wanted was to be together, for no reason at all… just because!

The Art of Being a Lefty

Living in a world where everything is geared to righties, the lefties had to learn to compensate in every way, become creative in numerous ways, so life worked for them. My brother Matthew was also a lefty, and I swear, we had our own lefty language. Even as we grew older, he would laugh and say “Ei, you do it just like I do!”

Yet, everywhere you go, be it the supermarket, school, work, or even at the dinner table, the lefties were always out of place. Time has passed and it has gotten a lot better; but for the most part, it is still a lefty world. If you knit or crochet, you know that all patterns are written for righties. If I were to follow a pattern it would come out inside out or backwards.

Being forced to be creative, though not an easy task, I learned how to make the righty pattern work for me. My home is designed for a lefty because it is my design; all things are to the left. People come into my home and say it’s ‘feng shui’, not realizing it’s merely ‘all to the left’. Then, lo and behold, I got the lefty blessing; 3 of my 5 granddaugthers are left-handed, despite the fact that their parents are righties. Oh, the irony of it all!

When my 2 older grandaugthers wanted to crochet and knit, Mom couldn’t show them how because she was a righty. Since I was the only one who could, being a lefty was no longer a curse; after a life of having to deal with being the odd man out, I was now blessed.

Today, I can live in both worlds. Try to make a righty live in a lefty world – no way! I can bowl righty or lefty, play tennis righty or lefty, throw a ball , comb my hair, dice veggies, bar tend – righty or lefty. Today, in a righty world I am ambidextrous, in almost every way, because every day, I conquered a challenge. God bless the lefties of the world!

p.s: when i write, my left pinky always gets covered with ink, so i wash my hands more too.

 

Eileen Gail

Eileen’s Journal: All Saint’s Day

 

November 2, 2013

 

Today is “All Saint’s Day”, a ‘holy day of obligation’.

Being raised a (somewhat) strict Catholic, it has been ingrained in me and I remember these things about my upbringing, including that we knew we had to go to mass on these days and pay respect to all the saints.

But today, as I was making breakfast for my 11yr old granddaughter, I shared with her that today was “All Saint’s Day“.

” What is “All Saint’s Day”?”
“Honey, it’s a holy day of obligation.”
“What’s that?

How do I explain a holy day of obligation? As I commenced to try, I was saddened when she said:

   ” I thought you only go to church on Sundays.”
(I was lost!)
     ”First of all, it’s not just church… it’s mass.”

She didn’t get it, but to my pleasant surprise, she did want to know all about it, and why did I know so much about religion and mass and holy days. I explained that I had been a catholic school girl, and that religion was my life.

I’m sad that my grandchildren do not say the rosary or pray on a daily basis. But that is up to their parents. Rest assured that I will teach them whenever I can., especially since they seem to genuinely like my stories and life truths.
Tomorrow is “All Soul’s Day” – another day that we go to mass and pray.

Eileen Gail